random post

hmp.
lack of sleep recently. so stress.
tomorrow another meeting and i hope everything will be carried on smoothly and peacefully. hope the manager will not torture us. hey, don't scold us as how you scold other colleagues OKAY?

goodnight guys!
and HI, the last month of the year - DEC!!

嗯

“。。。一个人假日发呆 找不到人陪我看海。。”
重复听着倒带。。。
仿佛唱出了我的心声、我的心境、我的感受
忘了何时开始，我想依赖而你却都不在
忘了何时开始，你都不在当我需要你的爱
忘了何时开始，你开始用金钱来填补你给的空白

你把最好的留给我，我何曾不是也想把最好的留给你
所以，我拒绝你给我的好。。。让你留给自己
你不明白我的用心，我不知如何解释。。。
所以结局总是争吵。
每一次闹得不愉快
到头来其实都是因为 我们太爱彼此。
原来，太爱彼此也是一种问题

看着你一跛跛地走 僵硬的双手
都还载着我 牵着我
坚持把你仅有的时间给我
尽全力也要换我一段笑容
你说，能不痛到心坑去吗？
你说，一个人的假日算什么？

一直都不觉得幸福
是因为不曾珍惜身边的那个人

♥ + ♥

sighs.
can you imagine how hot and stuffy is that if you're asked to wear the lab coat, sponge mask and apron hiding inside an unventilated lab which is equipped with heating apparatus whole day long and keep gluing, compressing, and heating, and waiting for the time.

erm, the most sarcastic aspect is that those who never working inside the lab will still want you to wear the lab coat and ask you to drink more water and also suggest you to go outside the lab which mean go to the fully-equipped-air-con office to ventilate yourself awhile when you're feeling suffocated. yet actually you'll never have the chance to do so as the manager is always staying outside the office whenever you want to escape from the hell in a moment.

the smell of heated plywood is really unbearable though it is as if the smell of biscuit whereas the body odor of the worker from indon is really... erm, so beyond description. sighs. and very sadly to say that, we're not encourage to sit down as the staff there keep indoctrinating us that sitting is a guilt. the manager might lesson you for sitting inside the lab without doing anything. sighs. seriously, we're suffering from severe legs pain.

hmp. and the fake course mate is really so disgusting. mood is spoiled every time her fakenesses appear. somehow i hope i can block her from msn. Weee... what a great suggestion. :))))

happy public holiday, pees

exhausted

today was supposed to be the 2nd day of internship, yet to me it was just my 1st day of training. the manager is much more younger than what i expected as i always thought manager is supposed to be older. he's really YOUNG la!! as young as you and me. he was the 1st one and also the only one who introduced himself to me though he was the last one who arrived the department this morning. right, without a colleague introduce themselves to me automatically. i don't know who they are and even no idea how to address them. but somehow i feel i must be very notorious to them because of the incident yesterday! argh! fortunately, i have a smart Maylin together with me! she told me everything included their names, their position.. and bla!!

well, the 1st thing i've learnt in the department is "Latihan Keselamatan & Kesihatan". the presentation was in BM! BM! BM! @.@'' keep yawning during the speech. while our supervisor is really nice and look nice too. :))) he explained the very basis information about plywood to us to give us a rough idea about how plywood is made. and the rest of time, Maylin and I are assigned to help a girl to test the plywood with different composition of glue. consequently, from 1000-12 and 1-5 pm, she and I were keep gluing, compressing, heating... in order to make few layers of verneers become a small piece of plywood using different type of glues and eventually send to somewhere else to cut into smaller pieces for soaking and bonding test. wooHoo, we did sweat alot too inside the laboratory. furthermore, both of us keep complaining too when our desperation are bubbled up. what to do, the work we did is kinda tedious and exhausting whereas these were the main factors to cause us creating mistakes during the progression. hahahaha....

one thing very funny is that during the lunch time, all the workers from different departments and factories are all walking on the pavements and using the zebra crossing when heading to the canteen. as if robots to me. xia soi once again, as i walked on the road until Maylin asked me to walk back to pavements. argh!!

the legs are really pain and eyes are really tired.
goodnight guys!

embarrassments

the 1st day of internship was very embarrassing.
i was the only one with unqualified hair color among the other trainees and was required to dye my hair to black color immediately.
good. i like the spirit of the company.
strict enough and nobody is excepted. this is the spirit for being an engineer. you never know what accident would be happened without obeying the strictness of the project that you're working on. yet, to be frank, i was so annoyed as i never anticipated i would spend money on blackening my hair at SALON!
apart from that, i missed the 1st day of internship.. missed everything that they've learnt today!! erm.. wondering what should i write on my 1st day of internship in the weekly training log? "... my hair color is rejected when i report for duty today. then i was free at home after i get my hair done ....?"
headache!!
so envy that every time i read others status at FB stating that their internship are kinda free. why ours aint? 2 times of meeting every week and present what you've learnt, to propose your ideas, to bring forward your problem... and at the end of the internship, yeah! present everything to the MANAGER!! you're totally wrong if you thought internship is all about shaking your legs at the office and receiving the allowance at the end of the month. argh! can't imagine how am i going to spend 3 months of internship and so to the rest of my career life.

sighs!

so stress la!!

GBM

衣服烫了又烫
鞋子试了又试
包包洗了又抹
闹钟调了又查
紧张还是紧张
啊！
对孰未谋面的同事、公司。。。
说不怕 有人会信吗？
保佑我
明天别睡迟啊！

保佑我

♥

):

sighs.
everyone is traveling now.
papa, mama, sis-in-law, sissss, little Felicia....
but what about me?
being a loner and staying at home alone to feel the loneliness.
a week seems so long for me now.
can't really imagine how am i going to spend a week time to being lonely at home.
sobs.
how strongly i wish i could be there with you guys.
how strongly i hope the internship was not start on this period.
how strongly i expect my international passport is not only for the customs of BRUNEI!!!

the mood was so spoiled this morning when they were off to airport.
the feeling was so hard...
especially when mama asked me what i wanna buy and she's going to buy for me.
especially when she told me to feed the chicks and to do other trivial things.
especially when papa reminded me to ensure the stoves are off before i go out, to feed the doggie, and lastly to dump the rubbish myself.
especially when little Felicia called me and asked whether i've cooked for myself.

when am watching drama, i feel lonely.
when am having meal, i feel lonely.
when am doing household chores, i feel lonely.
when am feeding the animals, i feel lonely.
i feel lonely whenever am home now...
yet, i still willing to stay at home instead of going out with frens.
why?
i just don't know why.

alone lonely loner

murmuring

and so, it's holiday. 3 months of holiday = 3 months of internship. time flies, year 3 of engineering course just over whereas year 09 is coming to the end. gonna start my very 1st internship in my life soon, very soon. the feeling of curiosity, nervousness, anxiousness, and frustration drown every little single cell of my body. of course, i do look forward to it too though i know that i will easily get tedious. it's really the time to face the real cruel social life and to adapt the life without spoon feeding. career, a brand new term in my life. :)))

bowling once again last night with favorite man and sis in order to kill the time while we were waiting for 2012. 3 of us played really bad this time. so so shame la!!!!! >.<

ahbao's turn

and the ChE 328: PIC... god, please bless me. i just want a 5. please don't let me to break the record for being the 1st one who fails PIC. i don't want to be notorious in curtin engineering department! argh! 9th of dec will be my doomsday. sad, am so sad... :(

argh!
WWT, i don't know what to do and how to do.

sighs.

random post

the best thing about tonight is that throwing all the lecture notes and tutorials and the textbook of PIC then having Japanese dinner with papa, mama, sisss, bro and sis-in-law, cousin and cousin-in-law, nephew and niece, felicia and little Luise and afterward, enjoying durian ice-cream and window shopping with family then lastly back home and blogging here.
yea...
gonna fail the last paper.
i just good for nothing. the brain is stupider than others whereas the laziness is stronger than others.
so speechless to myself. to my laziness. to my spirit of studying.
am fail to prepare, so now i am ready to fail.
:)))

so sorry for being such a useless people in my heart, the core of the heart.

cough...cough...cough...
it kills me especially at night.

*bounced ups and downs*

madly craving for such a long time and i always think that i would never ever have it again due to some personal reasons. yet, it just appeared in front of me in a spur of moment today. this was really so beyond my expectation... seriously, i could hardly find a better sentence or an adjective to describe my feeling when am holding it on my hands. it's JIM BRICKMAN!!! how wonderful! finally and eventually, i've got it! it's with me right now. yups!!! it's so near with me at this moment. it's no longer displaying at Popular bookstore with other companions. it now has an owner finally!!


i could not remember when did i begin to adore him. falling in love with his talent someday last year... the piano he used to play and the songs he sings just impress me deeply though am a music idiot... whereas my desktop has only 1 song of HIM!!! how sadly and this is the main reason cause me hardly resist it when i saw his album was displayed.

the only regret is that it's not given by favorite man.
favorite man arh favorite man......
don't you know that romance is the fuel that keeps love burning hot!!!
but love you still.
(:

always loving you

(:

our little prince, baby Luise...
he was suffering from jaundice when he was just few-week-old.
stayed at MCMC alone without mama beside him for three days long.
placed under the UV lamp nakedly whole day long
until his skin was peeled.
his mama was worried as the nurses were all busying chit-chatting
all the time.
they never noticed that the cloth to cover his eyes is loosen.
whereas our heart are so ached every time we visited him
especially his mama...

we've went ENOUGH hospital within this year!!!
say no to HOSPITAL!!!!!

and time flies...
gonna celebrating baby 1st month on this coming sat.
argh!
i can imagine how busy i can be.
as if how busy i was during little Felicia 1st month celebration.
my forever nightmare!!

yet, nothing is better than gathering with all family members
which are either from local or from other places.
this is the best benefit for organizing special occasions
though it's extremely tiring and still tiring!!!

to be frank, i can't really understand
why elders used to organize party as this in bygone days.
we've to prepare different and enough delicacies
and drinks for the guests, serving them
and lastly tidy up all the leftover and wash uncountable utensils
as well as clean up the living room, kitchen... until you wear out.
you can't imagine how destructive the kids of the guests can be!!!
while the most unbearable thing is that...
you cannot do anything to the naughty kids apart from
watching them destroying the sofa, the tables, the chairs, the floor,
and whatever things that can be destroyed happily.

also, i can't understand
why mummy do not murmurs as what she used to do
for preparing so much things from morning till the night!!!
....

i don't use to understand all these when am still a goon.
yet, now i know the reason why.
as all these just worth.

a night of gathering is so rare but precious.

family, always the top of priority