SAVE ME!!!

sighs
when i think about INTERVIEW... my heart beat pauses for few seconds
but somehow, the more you dislike "something"... it will come to you more frequently...
perhaps that's how God tries to strengthen us by forcing us to face the thing that you dislike instead of encouraging you to escape the problem which hides deeply inside your heart...
the only consequent of escaping problem is leading you to an dead end. then your everything is ended as expected...
that's why, the one and only way to solve every single problem is to face it.. FACE it!!!

thus, my life is filled with endless INTERVIEWs....
God bestows me plenty of chances to resolve my fear... and the rest is depending on myself. to face it or to escape it.... to go or not to go... that's all about decision...it's as if the poem that we had studied in bygone days - the road taken and the road not to be taken..
there's without second chance if i made a wrong decision according to the misery condition of my internship applications.

sadly to declare, nobody wants me...

yups, i'll be off to Bintulu tomorrow for an INTERVIEW for my internship application after struggling for quite a long time. to be frank, i feel a little bit excited when i received their call. at least, there's still A company willing to give me a better feedback!!! ya~ the company is specialized at palm oil refinery and is located at Bintulu... somewhere far away from Bintulu town.... nearly an hour ride from town to the company, i anticipated. that's the ONLY thing i know about the company!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't know about palm oil. i don't know about refinery. i don't know everything about engineerS. what i know is that i need a company to hire me!!! :'(((((

ignoring the interview sections, i just not able to imagine how my life will be going on if i had no choice but to stay at Bintulu for 3 months internship. 3 months!!! it's 3 months!!!! 3 months without everything at Miri!!!! sorry, i just too vulnerable to be independent at all!!! :((((((( sorry mum and dad, i'm such a useless daughter!!! sorry bros and sis, i also can't understand why the youngest 1 always would be the weakest 1?? sighs...

i feel so much reluctance's filling every single cell of my body now and persuading my mind not to go to Bintulu for the interview, but i have no choice!!!! possibly i would faint in front of the interviewer if the questions he/she asked were as deadly as Shell's!!!!! :((((((((

god please bless me
lady luck please stay with me
i want nothing
but a placement of internship