临睡前
我总希望着
明天醒来
眼睛 痊愈了

但，
每天醒来
我又再失落一次
戴上让我很没自信的眼镜
到处告诉别人我很没自信

:'(((((((

the new member...

my new toy

:))))

it's the only booty that i hunted during the tiring trip last week!!

the reason why did i choose lion was simple :-

as i am a true leo!!!!

people said it looks fierce and fugly but i think it looks quite handsome!!

it has its own temperament and is unique among the other

lol

i know it sounds boastful but that's what LEOs are!!!

and the first weeks of this semester is gonna end soon.

it's really beyond my imagination that

how speedy and silently the time flies

new semester...

waked kinda early last few days when i was not at miri and thus i think early class on the first day of new semester isn't a big problem for me!!! :))).... and when i downloaded the materials needed for the 1st class tomorrow... i nearly faint!!!! why??? aspen hysys again!!!!!!!!!!!!!! why why why... why i just cant get rid of it!!! it's so annoying and i still remember how TYL failed my final paper!!! it made me get a grade 5 for that subject!! i hate grade 5 LA!!!! the feeling of staying all night long just aimed to finish the god damn group project last semester still embark in my mind!!!! i don't wanna back to school!!!!!!!

and my eyes are hurted and my stomach is suffering from gastric this few days after i had my dinner!!!!! :(((((((

and my internship............... ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

life's hard, undeniably!!

:D

will be leaving here tomorrow and only will be back on Sunday!!! this should be considered as my last vacation during this holiday. and then have to return back to school life. sighs. it's too bad that i am not able to spend the last few days of holiday with favorite man. going to miss him again... :'((((( he used to spend less time on me. and i can imagine how this situation getting worst when my new semester commences. but life isn't all about bf and gf, i knew that. :))) he should pay more effort on his career while i should be more energetical on my studies for better future.

LoL... future!!! normally, i dare not to think about future. but you know, i was stunned when i browsed the academic background of the lectures that are working at curtin currently. i knew that i am so weird but i really did that when i was extremely bored . :)))) comparing with them, i personally think that am not only a good-for-nothing, but wasting my time every seconds. i can't have a better life in my future as i am not able to get a better job with better salary in a better company with my so KNS results!!! had went through some self-reflection afterward and i eventually throw all the responsibility to favarite man and lastly i decided to give up on our relationship. what a selfish gf i am!!! however, this stupid thought is then failed very soon. LoL!!

and a funny stranger sent his pic to my hp when 'm blogging. too bad, not his naked pic la!

LoL~ ~ ~

a little update

i just can't understand why am i so stupid that willing to stay at favorite man's office whole day long... from morning 9 until 6. staying at his office is kinda sickening for me as he starved me the whole morning and only had my brunch on 1 something. he keeps dizzying me by playing his childish game repeatedly until i need to prepare a plastic bag for myself. yups, a plastic bag to load the vomit. lol....

and yesterday went to Marybrown with favorite man and sis. was our very fist time to go to the new opening Marybrown here with high expectation. but the food was so disgusting and caused me a bad digestion. yuaks!! i hate MARYBROWN now!!!!!!!!!! the tomato source there had a very weird smell that sis claimed it was like the smell of cockroaches!!! while the soft drink tasted a little bit of the smell of running water!!! *puke*

the last time we took this was 2++ years ago :))))) heart heart him!!!

sis and my bun face! *screams*

and i purposely took this pic as Ms. Joanne got this also! LoL!!
mango puree is simply irresistible!

holiday will be ended soon
:(

loss

suddenly the fattening donuts came to my mind!!
yups...
simply miss the 50 donuts that favorite man bought me months ago...
and recently was seriously indulged in popcorn
it really addicted people especially when you are
watching series for killing your time and to fulfill the holiday
:)))

it's a week till the commencement of new semester
i don't wanna school!!
i don't wanna sit for the god damn testsssss!!!!
i don't wanna do the endless assignments and revise endlessly!!!!
:(((((

and when i think of the application of the internship position
i * puke *
it's as if a bloody hell for me
* screams *

♥ drowning ♥

coming gradually...

as expected, shell declined my internship application
yesterday. 1925pm
5 days after the interview
3 working days..
then i was disqualified
lol

new semester is about to commence
a week left
and eleven thousand is gone
yawn yawn yawn
how hard i need to work to meet end need and
to pay the debt from Hi-Ed after completing my studies?
i think possibility i need to repay the debt until my last breath
but i don't mind
what i really scare about is that
there is without a company willing to hire me
then i got no money to repay everything i owe now

somehow i feel Chem. Eng.
is totally not suitable for myself
argh!!!!
i don't suitable to be an engineer
but everything is just too late...
time won't turn back

i can only proceed forward instead of regretting
the decision that i had made 2 and half years ago
....

it's fate!
:(((

...everything is coming gradually with time...