random update in the middle of night.

it has been a long long time since i last blog on my blog. more than 2 months i guess. all because of the laziness and the habit of procrastination. i couldn't understand why when i was in Uni i was quite hardworking on updating my blog. right now, 'm like a free bird after working hour but i have no time and no stamina to blog. emm... time really has the power of fading the passion on "something". i always think to come back to blog, to crap, to type, to refresh my english, to hmm... i don't know. i feel like am getting older after i left uni. somebody please tell me why!

oh ya, i have just finished my 3 months of probation period in the company. sadly, 'm still not being reviewed yet and thus hey, 'm not yet being confirmed & qualified as a permanent employee! there are too much things to talk about my work place, my work condition, my feeling to this and that, to you and him and her and whatsoever. remember last time an experience people told me that, to be a professional, you've to keep low profile. that's why i don't feel like talking the issues in public. not even share with my family members as i was tired to think about JOBS when 'm home. but 'm only human. i need someone to listen. to understand. to know. to feel. the feeling of me. i know that i shouldn't give up easily. i know i should think the reason why and what makes me hold on for so long when i feel like giving up.

hmm... i'm not happy at all. and this unhappy feeling started to be with me gradually and accumulated day by day. second by second. i realized that the longer i working at the company, the sadder i will be.


argh.

to be continued.